"I do what I want," he replied nonchalantly, lathering shampoo into his greasy hair. "Why does everything smell girly?"
Allon replied by pulling off his pants and shoving his way into the shower, anyway.
“You already used so much of the hot water.” He grumbled, hoping that Judas would let the girly smelling thing go. He liked fruity shampoos, okay. “I was going to wash my hair.”
“Don’t drop the soap,” said Judas, shrugging. “And I’ll use as much of the hot water as I fucking want—I’m the guest, right?”
Allon replied by antagonistically grabbing the soap and threw it onto the shower floor.
“Oh no, my bad.” He teased, reaching for the shampoo instead. “You really shouldn’t swear in a church, you know.”
“Fuck your shithead self in the motherfucking asshole you piece of fucking shit on fire,” he replied calmly. “The church can calm its tits for right now.”
He just laughed, slicking his hair back and rubbing shampoo through it. “Silly, I don’t care. I don’t mind if you’re an atheist, or anything. So, you can do what you please. I just thought you’d want to be courteous but I really don’t care.”
He shrugged, rinsing his hair.
“Fuck your courtesy,” he said, shrugging. He rinsed the suds off of his hair and skin, leaving his complexion shades lighter than it had been before.
“Ah, that’s better. Thanks.” He hopped out of the tub and dried himself off with Allon’s towel. “I’ll be going now.”
“Wait!” He groaned. “If you aren’t going to stay, then at least come back another time. Besides, you can stay here over night, if you need. I’ll even let you shower, if you’d like.”
He would have stepped out of the shower, but his entire bathroom was already soaked and he didn’t want to contribute to the mess.
“Why?” he asked, concealing a smile. “You got a crush on me or somethin’, pal?” He picked up his baseball bat and used the towel to wipe the grime off of it.
“I got what I wanted, so it’s better if I just leave, right? Gimme a good reason to stay.”
“Because, uhm.” He had, actually, pretty much run out of reasons for him to stay that didn’t stray into a rather creepy area. “Because, like I said, if you don’t have anywhere else to go, there’s a spare room here for you to use.”
“That the best you got?” he asked, resting the bat on his shoulder. The gesture looked far less formidable without clothes.
“Oh. Also, your clothes aren’t done washing. And I don’t have any spare clothes for you to borrow. Besides, you’re much shorter than I am.” He replied honestly. “So, I guess you have to stay now.”
“I can go naked. Pretend to be one of those drugged out hippies, right?” He grinned, tossing the bat from hand to hand. “Who needs clothes—mine were worn anyway. Clothes don’t make the man.”
He just rolled his eyes.
“Fine, if you insist on leaving, please come back eventually. I do get lonely during the weekdays, and bored. There’s not much to do except sit around and clean the church.” He slicked his hair back out of habit.
Out of nowhere, Judas burst into laughter.
“Wow, what kind of pussy are you? Almost thought you had spirit. I’ll be waiting on your bed until my clothes are dry—then I’m gone for good, good sir.” He bowed insincerely.
“The clergy sure breeds weak ones, huh?”
Allon just frowned, rinsing off his hair again. He stepped out of the shower and went in search of a clean towel. He had a few spares, which he found were stashed away in the cabinet above the washer. He wished he had remembered that sooner, as he grabbed one and used it to dry himself off.
He checked on the state of the clothes in the washer, but they were still getting clean. He might even run them twice. Once he finished, he walked into his bedroom again and pulled on a pair of clean underwear.
“If you’re going to wait on my bed, at least put on some clothes. You can even borrow a pair of my underwear, just don’t sit there naked.” He replied, tossing a clean pair at Judas.
Judas tossed them back.
“Your butt’s too big—they won’t fit, so there’s no point. Toss me a blanket if it bugs you so much, though I can’t see why it would. We just showered together.” He stretched out on the bed, laying down shamelessly.
“So tell me about yourself—through all your boring kiss-ass drivel, I admit you caught my interest.”
He just tossed the underwear back into his drawer, sitting down on a chair by the bed. He rested his feet on the bed.
“I’m the boring one.” He replied truthfully. “My father was a cop, my mom was a housewife. I became a priest and managed to dodge the draft. I’m only 29, and I spend most of my time reading and cleaning. Though, I suppose I have a strong sense of justice. That’s about it, though. Nothing big or interesting about my life.”
“My life isn’t interesting either,” he said with a shrug, “so why the hell do you want me to stick around?”
“It’s sure as hell more interesting than my life.” He paused. “…excuse the language. It’s true, though. You’re interesting. I like you quite a bit.”
He shrugged. “I told you about myself, what about you?”