Crows and Seagulls Are Totally Pals Right?

The assassin known as Crow was waiting patiently for the man he was meeting to arrive. He wasn't a fan of discussing details in person, but some clients refused to use technology to hire him. So, he was forced to meet them.

This time, he was waiting in a hotel lobby. He drew a small amount of attention, for his odd style of dress, but besides that no one paid him much mind.

A younger man, clothed completely in white, entered the room and sat down next to him. His posture radiated cockiness; despite his thin stature, he seemed to think he was hot stuff. He chewed incessantly--perhaps tobacco?

In any case, he paid the man next to him no heed.

Before Crow could say anything about his annoying chewing, a man appeared in the lobby. He looked nervous, but it was obvious he was the one Crow was waiting for. He stood up and walked towards the man, his walk that of a confident model.

But before he could reach the man, the man in white stood up and briskly walked past him.

He nodded at the man politely, tugging on his hair in a bored manner.

"I'm here for the business meeting we arranged, sir."

The nervous man nodded.

"W-we can speak...in my room." He said, to both the man in white and the man in black.

The man in white nodded, still chewing obnoxiously.

"And I trust it'll be just you and me? No unscheduled visitors? After all, this is a serious line of work I'm in, sir...some discretion is advised."

Finally, the man in black spoke.

"Excuse me, but, I think you have the wrong man." He put his hands on his hips, frowning at the boy in white. "After all, he obviously looked at me. I'm the one he wants to talk to."

The man in white raised his eyebrow, his expression stoic.

"Look--I know this is the man I'm looking for, my boss gave me a description this morning. I don't know where your John is--or why one interested in...Gothic hookers would visit a hotel like this, but this guy isn't him. Now run along while the adults talk." For someone so young-looking, he was rather condescending; he stared at his nails as he waited for Crow to leave.

"How sweet. You have a boss." He rolled his eyes. "Sir, I'm not sure what you're thinking, but..."

"A-allow me to explain..." Mumbled the man. "Once we're all in my room."

"...All?" hissed the man in white suddenly, placing his hands on his hips. He spat his gum out onto the floor, crushing it with his shoe. "Sir, I told you no unexpected visitors--if you're going to pull this, then I'm afraid I can't commence with the meeting. Boss wouldn't like that."

"Please, hear me out first." He insisted. "If you don't like the terms, you can leave. But until then, please hear me out."

He crossed his arms, tapping his shoe impatiently.

"I'm listening, old man--make it quick."

"...Let us speak in private, first." He motioned down the hall to a room."

He eyed the man suspiciously.

"...Fine. But if you two pull any shit, I'm going to shoot both of you in the face."

Crow shrugged slightly.

"You can hope."

The nervous man led the way, into the room and closed the door. He relaxed once they were inside.

"The thing is," He started, "I hired you both."

The man--or rather, boy in white snorted.

"This guy is an assassin? That's funny--hell, it's fucking hilarious. He looks like a reject from an emo strip club." He pulled out a gun, aiming it at the client's face.

"I really hate jokes, though--so start being serious before I decline this job permanently."

The nervous man squeaked.

"No, no, please, believe me! I really, really need this guy dead. Gone. Forever. I can't chance it by hiring just one. So I hired you both."

He shook his head, sighing.

"You did not just say that. You're telling me that you not only hired Stripperella here--in direct violation of my terms, no less--but you did it because you think I'm inadequate. That's like fucking a man's mother twice over--you know what happens when you fuck an assassin's mom, jerkoff?"

Crow sighed heavily.

"Just ignore him. If he doesn't want the money, then he can get his cute little behind out of here." He looked at the man in white severely. "Choose, you little assassin, you."

He pulled out another gun, calmly taking aim at Crow's face.

"I don't like you either, whore. The only thing you'd be good at whacking is other guys' dicks."

He smiled at the man in white.

"You seem more interested in me than you should. Are you looking to 'hire' my services?" He looked highly amused, and completely relaxed for someone with a gun pointed at him.

"Someone as ugly as you? You'd be cheap--probably full of AIDS."

Crow laughed.

"Oh, the naivety of some people." He slowed his speech mockingly. "Do you know what a condom is, little naive assassin?"

"The things shoved so far up your whore asshole you can't take a shit? Yeah, I know what they are," he replied flatly.

He laughed again.

"You know? I like you. Sadly, I have a job to be doing." He turned back to the nervous man, who just looked awkward at this point. "I accept. Just give me the information already."