Androids Are Totally More Than Just Sex Bots

Gideon Faulkner sat alone in his room, playing a video game. Though he was a healthy young boy, one of his arms gleamed a pale white in the light from the screen; it was a top-of-the line prosthetic, attached when he was only six. Now, on his ninth birthday, he couldn't remember life without it. It seemed as though he had been born with this sleek, robotic arm.

There was a knock on the door. Pausing his game, Gideon hurried to open the door; to his mild disappointment, his parents were nowhere to be found. Rather, there was a huge box wrapped in pink paper and ribbons.

He examined the card taped to the box: "Happy Birthday, Gideon. We'll both try to be home early for dinner on your special day. Enjoy this special present in the mean time--we think you'll like it! Love, Mommy and Daddy."

He stared at the box, frowning; what could they have possibly bought him? His parents didn't really know him that well, as much as they'd never admit it. He hoped it wasn't something strange.

Taking a deep breath, he tore away the wrapping paper and popped the box open, peering inside.

Immediately, he was swept off his feet; literally. A tall, fatherly man picked him up, and hugged him tightly. When he let him down, he wore a huge smile on his face.

"Hello there!" He said, in a voice that sounded like it had been recorded from a 50's sitcom. "My name is HomeModel 91-023-69 A. You can choose to rename me at any time, though most people name their HomeModel's John, Robert, Michael, David or William. Feel free to choose from the list, or make up your own."

The man smiled at him, though it was obvious to someone of this era he was not a human. If there was any doubt, on the back of his head, at the nape of his neck, there was a inconspicuous black scanner code.

"Are you a robot?!" asked Gideon, surprised. He held up his hand so HomeModel 91-023-69 A could see. "Like me, only all of you is like this? I've heard about things like you. Does this mean I'm your owner?"

"Yes, you are my owner, young Gideon." He replied, smiling brightly at him. "I have seven different modes, my default mode is the Urban Husband. I can change my appearance and gender at will. Whatever best suits you. However you would like to be addressed, I can change accordingly."

He paused, as if thinking about anything he may have forgotten.

"Ah, yes. My AI, artificial intelligence, function may be shut off at any time. If you would prefer it, I can become a simple VI, virtual intelligence." He smiled again. "One more thing; if left alone, I will change into my preferential appearance. You may order me to change at any time."

"Well, I'm sorry," he said, crossing his arms, "But I don't like adults. They lie a lot. I don't think we can play together or anything; I'm sorry."

"Oh, well, that's too bad." He replied, frowning. "I was hoping we'd be friends. If you'd like, I can change my age to suit yours. Or, I can attempt to convince you that adults really don't lie all the time."

He smiled down at him. "Personally, speaking freely as an AI, I think that the more time you spend with me, the more you'll realize it's not even possible for me to lie."

He winked.

"I'm not programmed to lie. I can't."

"Yeah, but you're not a real adult," he said, frowning. "Besides, I don't believe you can change your age--even the robots on TV can't do that. So I'm sorry, but you'll have to go back."

Gideon made his way to the kitchen, pouting. His parents had bought him a robotic babysitter? It seemed like more of a punishment than a gift. As much as he hated the amount of time he spent alone each day, he hated adults more. They had this awful habit of playing with you like you were a cute toy for a few minutes, then disappearing for days. They never kept promises or even kept in touch; whatever programming was in their brains, it was extremely flawed.

Soon, he was tackled by a boy who looked barely older than he was. Maybe ten or eleven. Tall, and lanky for his age, but darker skinned and freckled.

"See!" He replied, giggling. "I told you. I'm amazing, aren't I?"

Gideon shoved him away, frowning.

"How'd you do that? Robots can't do that, can they? No one can get younger--it doesn't work that day. Today I'm nine, not seven." He held up nine fingers as though it were concrete proof.

"...I guess you aren't that bad. But still. It's weird. Do robots eat apple slices?" He opened the fridge and pulled out a small, sealed bag. "I can share."

He nodded.

"Yes! I can eat and cook for you, if you want~" He smiled happily. "Thank you, master~"

He pouted suspiciously, ripping the package open and offering the HM A an apple slice.

"My name's Gideon, okay? If you're my robot, you should remember it. Not a lot of people say it, so if you say it maybe I won't forget it. He sat down at the table, eating an apple slice while maintaining an impressive grimace. "My parents aren't even home for my birthday. They promised too--see? Adults' promises are worthless."

He drummed the table with his fingers, glancing at the android.

"So I'm supposed to give you a name?" he asked aloud.

"Yes, Gideon." He smiled, enjoying the sound of the name already. Not that he could enjoy the name. Officially, anyway. "You only have to name me if you wish. I'll respond to any name you give me, Gideon."

He sat down as well, savoring the food. He wasn't really supposed to eat, but how was he going to turn down a present from his new master?

He frowned intensely, thinking.

"...I'll name you Caspian," he said finally. "After Prince Caspian. Have you heard of him?"

"One second..." He looked deep in thought. "Yes. I know him. Why did you choose that name for me?"

"Because he was a hero," he said matter-of-factly. "His uncle was evil and lied to him, but he still did great things. I would want someone like that for a friend. So, your name can be Caspian." He ate another apple slice, holding one out to the newly-named Caspian.

"So you'll call me Gideon and I'll call you Caspian. Is that okay? Do you like your name?"

"Yes. I love it." He replied, honestly feeling the swell of emotions. Fake or not, they were there. "Caspian...it sounds good. Thank you, Gideon."

He just smiled wider.

Gideon blushed awkwardly.

"Whatever, it's just a name, okay? So do you want to play with video games, or...?"

-x-

"Gideon!" Called Caspian form the kitchen. "I made you lunch! It's your favorite~!"

He sighed happily, staring at his own work admirably. This was some of his best work yet. Besides, in a few days it would be Gideon's 16th birthday, and he wanted to give him a treat beforehand.

Gideon hurried into the kitchen, a big smile on his face.

"Hey!" he said brightly. "Looking forward to the upgrades I'm gonna buy you with my birthday money? You can pick any ones you want."

He happily dug into the plate of Greek food, savoring the taste of the lamb. "Mmm! This is delicious. You've really outdone yourself, Cas..."

He sighed deeply. "To think, I'll be sixteen in a few days--that's when manhood starts, you know. I still haven't even gone on my first date. Do you think that's odd, Cas?"

Caspian stared at him for a second.

"Gideon, I believe it's time for 'the talk'." He said, setting down the knife he was holding. "You may decline the talk, but it's highly suggested you don't. If you'd like, we can wait until you're done eating, and make our way to a more comfortable location."

"I'm fine with talking now," he said, mildly confused. "We can talk about anything you want, Cas."

"Alright." He replied, smiling nervously. He felt nervous, but he didn't know why. Something felt weird in his stomach. "Gideon, you're on your way to becoming a grown man. You're nearly sixteen, the ripe age for young boys like yourself to start getting girlfriends."

He hesitated, but Cas couldn't figure out what his problem was. Hesitation wasn't written into his programming for this talk. What was going on? "Girlfriends. Ah, uhm...Right. Girlfriends. Sometimes, women, I mean girls, will ask you out on dates...Or sometimes, they'll touch you and..."

Cas frowned deeply. "Sometimes your body feels strange, and you'll experience things. Like erections. But if you have sex, you mustn't do it unless you love the person. So, it's the sort of thing you should do with me."

Then, Cas froze. What was he saying. This wasn't right. What was he doing. What what WHAT.

"...please excuse the error in my speech." He said, blinking, confused.

Gideon's face turned pink.

"...Cas, can you even do that? Have sex, I mean, not glitch...though I am kind of worried.

"You've been glitching a lot lately, haven't you? You're touching me a lot more than usual, and you keep on misspeaking...should we get you looked at?" He caressed Caspian's cheek, frowning with concern.

"I can have sex." He replied instantly, without even thinking about it. "I am a fantastic sex partner. I am a perfect sex partner! I can please you like no one else."

On a whim, he picked up Gideon princess style. "I'll show you!"

"What," he said flatly, his eyes wide with shock. Perhaps he would have said something under ordinary circumstances, but he couldn't seem to find the words now.

"I...just like that?!" he inquired, unsure of what to make of his robot's behavior. Maybe Caspian had finally absorbed too much data. Maybe one of his processing chips had worn out. Gideon could almost feel physical pain in his chest at the thought of his poor robot in disrepair. There was nothing--no one--he loved more int he world than his seven-year-old HM A model android.