I Use the Term "Missionary" Loosely

Thaddeus stumbled, falling backwards.

"W-what the fuck did you just do?!" he exclaimed, reaching for his pistol.

Faust replaced the mirror into his hat; it appeared just a few feet away.

"Science." He claimed, putting his hat back on. "Please don't use that in here; I have many nasty chemicals you don't want to release."

He pointed it at Faust.

"Where the fuck did you bring me?!!"

He sighed.

"Really, I don't want either of us to die." He replied, frowning. "I brought you to my house, dear Thaddeus."

"I FUCKING WANT YOU TO DIE!!" he screamed senselessly.

He sighed audibly, toying with his hair.

"Don't make me show you my eyes. It's not a pleasant experience."

"I'll fucking shoot them out!" he hissed.

Faust simply stepped closer, watching him carefully.

"You sure are quick to try and kill me."

"I don't like you!" he retorted incredulously. "You're a fag and a fucking creep!"

"Right." He said, rolling his non-visible eyes. "You wanted somewhere to sleep, right? I have a guest room for you."

"I'm not sleeping here," he insisted. "I'll sleep out here before I sleep in there."

"I'm afraid I'll be in my lab making all sorts of noise all night." He explained. "I don't think you want to be around that."

"...I'll leave, then."

"Please, stay." He said, frowning slightly. "I'm lonely."

"I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!" he barked.

Faust shrugged.

"I don't think you have a choice."

"I can just shoot you," he said, trying to convince himself more than Faust. "Blast your fucking head off."

"Yes, but this room is always locked from the outside. Heavily locked up." He explained. "Only I can work the mirror and my hat; you would be stuck in here forever."

He smiled widely.

"You don't want that, do you?"

"Let me out, then!" he barked.

"But you won't kill me, and I won't be lonely anymore. You don't have anything to offer me. Why should I open the door for you?"

"...I'll fucking break everything!!" he screamed.

"You'll die." He said bluntly. "The chemicals in here are all toxic if not sealed properly."

"Better than staying here," he spat. "My brother's dead--I've accomplished my life goals."

Unfazed he said, "I'll let you out if you have sex with me."

"...I'm killing us both," he said simply, taking aim at Faust's heart.