I Use the Term "Missionary" Loosely

"You can leave whenever you want." He said, smiling still.

"I don't trust you," he replied simply. "You were going to keep me there last time until I threatened murder-suicide."

"But now you have a reason to stay." He replied cheerily. "So I'm less worried."

"I haven't decided if I have a reason to stay," he corrected. "I am merely considering it."

He rolled his eyes.

"Then decide." Faust replied pushily.

"I'll give you my answer in three days--I'm going home." He turned around to leave, slinging his groceries over his shoulder.

"Come to my house with your decision, my dear Thaddeus~!" He called after him.

He waved a hand, the universal symbol for "kthxbye".

-x-

Three days later, Faust was sitting in his house, enjoying a cup of hot tea. He had just gotten back from masturbating to visiting Priestly and Mars.

Those two were always so fun to harass~

Meanwhile, Thaddeus was tearing apart his hotel room. Where the bloody hell had he dropped Faust's card?...the one time he needed the little sludgebag, he couldn't reach him.

Still, Faust continued to sip his tea. He checked his watch, much too eager for his own good. He really hoped Thaddeus took him up on his offer. There was something he liked about him.

Unable to find the business card anywhere, he let out a yell of frustration; what was he going to do?...

Reclining, Faust reached for his trusty hat and peered inside.

"My dear Thaddeus, are you looking for me~?" He called into it, knowing it would reach his intended target.

After all, while he had groped him at the store, he had placed a small device on him, which acted as a tracker and a means of communication.

He jumped, knocking over a lamp.

"...Where the hell are you, faggot?!"

He smiled upon hearing that.

"If you're asking where I'm talking to you from, I'm actually inside your pants." He giggled. "Or do you want my address?"

Thaddeus pulled his pants off over his boots and chucked them to the other side of the room, disgusted.

"...Just...where the fuck can I meet you? I've made a decision."

"I live on north Amber." He said. "It's a big, creepy looking house. You'll probably recognize it."

"...North Amber?" he asked, pacing. "You sure you shoulda told me that? I can organize a drive-by, now."

"And what benefit would that for you?" He asked, shifting his position slightly. "But you know? You have a really hot voice the more I listen."

Sighing, Thaddeus grabbed another pair of pants.

"...I'll be there."

Faust grinned.

"Hurry up, my dear Thaddeus~"

Shuddering, Thaddues hurried to the house Faust had described; once there, he waited awkwardly in front of it.

...What now?...

Of course, the all knowing Faust opened the door soon afterwards. He was, however, clad in what appeared to be lingerie.

"Come in~" He purred.

He immediately turned around and walked away.

He grabbed Thaddeus and forced him inside.

"I was in the middle of dressing." He told him seriously, grabbing his suit pants and shirt off of the couch where he had left them. He quickly put them on.