The Ambassadors From Germany and Britain Are Having An Affair: NOT CRAP CHARACTERIZATION OF WILHELM EDITION

When they arrived, Eadric undid his seatbelt, waiting patiently for his door to be opened.

Wilhelm opened the door and offered his hand to help Eadric out of the car, if he so chose.

Eadric ignored his hand, standing up on his own.

"Lead me to where you wish to talk."

Wilhelm nodded, leading him into the house and up quite a few flights of stairs until they reached a small, attic type room. It was, however, finished and colored in rich blues. It was basically a small tearoom.

Eadric sat down in a comfy arm chair, crossing his legs once more.

"Now, please explain why you have summoned me here."

Wilhelm sat across from him, taking out his notebook and writing once again.

To be frank, you fascinate me. You are very interesting to me. I would enjoy spending time with you outside of work.

He passed the paper to Eadric.

He stared at the paper, surprised.

"...And this is related to foreign policy how?..."

Yes, I also wished to discuss things of that nature as well, however, I thought I should be absolutely clear about my intentions first and foremost. He wrote simply.

He nodded.

"Fair enough--please continue."

As far as foreign policy goes, Germany is going through economic troubles right now as you well know. We want to request aid from America, but we aren't sure how. You requested aid recently, and I was wondering if you could perhaps help me. He smiled persuasively. I am, of course, willing to repay your generosity, if you do lend me your aid.

"...Repay my generosity?" he repeated.

He nodded.

Whether formally, or informally, and however you wish. It would mean a lot to me. He wrote, giving Eadric a somewhat suggestive smile.

"...Elaborate."

If you help me, I will repay you. He wrote, then paused to figure out how to word it. If what you would like in return is advice from me later down the road, I am fine with that. If what you would like is, say, something personal between us such as two friends going to dinner, then I am fine with that as well.

"I don't see myself in need of your advice anytime soon," he replied curtly.

Then you would enjoy dinner, perhaps? He wrote, smiling widely at Eadric.

"I can have dinner any time by myself," he replied, staring at his nails. "You know what I really need?"

Wilhelm shook his head, looking at Eadric quizzically.

"A good shag," he replied bluntly. "People say that one of the reasons I'm so ornery is that I need to get laid, and they're right."

Wilhelm tried to hide his obvious apprehension about that, with little success.

Shaking slightly he wrote, Are you sure you wouldn't prefer dinner?

"No. Which is why I'm sure there is nothing you can offer me, Ambassador."

He frowned deeply, his smile finally disappearing completely. He hunched over in his chair, leaning over his notebook thoughtfully. Wilhelm knew he needed help and he was willing to do literally anything except sex.

What if we went on dates, instead? He offered, almost glad he didn't have to speak; he might have sounded desperate.

"Are you suggesting that I am a homosexual?" he accused suddenly, glaring pointedly at Wilhelm.

He smiled suddenly.

I am insinuating that dating someone is just as good of a way to relieve stress as sex is. He wrote, but he couldn't seem to get rid of his small smile. You don't have to be physically attracted to have a relationship with me.

"But you are still insinuating that I would want a relationship with a man," he pressed, obviously irked. "I don't care what rumors you've heard--my sexuality is not something for you to speculate on."