Prank Wars Are So Gay

Yuri glared at Blair, completely unamused.

"There's no need to be a douche about it Blair--it's part of my religion."

Blair just gave him a look.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Just strip and give me my soda," he demanded, rolling his eyes. "I've been dying of thirst for an hour."

He still gave him that look.

"If you're dying, you should probably do something about it." He replied simply.

"Yes. Force you to get me a Coke, which is what I'm doing," he insisted.

Finally, Blair stomped into the kitchen. After a prolonged period of time, he returned and handed an already open coke to Yuri.

"Take it." He said, glaring down at him.

"You have to dance first!" he insisted. "Pants off."

Grumbling, he set down the coke and stripped off his pants. He did his retarded shaky hip dance and then shoved the coke at Yuri again.

Yuri smiled, taking it from him.

"Thanks, Blair~ You didn't have to open it, you know--that's not against my religion."

He cracked a smile at that, however.

"I know."

Yuri took a sip, stretching.

"Wanna watch the Discovery Channel? Shark Week isn't until tomorrow, but it's still something to do."

"Actually, yeah, I do." He pulled his pants back on and sat down as far away from Yuri as possible, but he cracked a grin.

Yuri rolled his eyes.

"I'm not going to curse you if you sit on the couch, Blair."

"Oh, but I can't trust you." He lied, looking as worried as he possibly could.

He groaned, sighing.

"You're such a big baby today."

But Blair turned away, trying not to snicker.

Yuri gave him an odd look; Blair sure was acting weird today...

Of course, he figured out why approximately half and hour later. Yuri sat on the toilet, groaning and gripping his stomach; that colossal asshole.

-x-

The next day, Yuri awoke before Blair and went into the living room to watch TV. It was only a matter of time before he woke up and pulled on a pair of his stupid shorts...

Blair woke up and sleepily pulled on his shorts. The reaction was, of course, rather expected. He screamed, he yelled profanities and he may or may not have sobbed as he clambered his way into the bathroom and into the shower.

When he came out, he was dripping wet and looking for blood.

"Yuri." He hissed.

Yuri looked up from the TV.

"Shark Week started without you, sleepyhead. What, were you up all of last night with uncontrollable diarrhea?" He glared pointedly at Blair before returning his attention to Discovery Channel. "Also, I don't know if you mean to come onto me, what with being all naked and wet, but I'm not interested. Not that I don't swing that way--you're just really small."

He began to lunge for Yuri, but before he got too close, he realized he shouldn't beat the crap out of him naked. So, he went back into his room to find shorts that weren't booby-trapped.

"ALL OF THEM?!" He exclaimed angrily. "I HAVE THINGS TO DO TODAY!!"

Yuri couldn't hide a small grin.

"Something wrong, roomie?" he called.

Blair stormed back into the room, out for blood.

"You're a bitch!" He growled. "A faggot, and a complete asshole!"

"The last time I checked I was a male human, I'm a bisexual virgin, and I have many other body parts besides my asshole--I'd actually prefer if you were less obsessed with that part of me, you're starting to creep me out."

He walked over to Yuri, quite calmly, and bitch-smacked him.

"No, you've crossed the line!"

Yuri grabbed his cheek, looking surprised but unpained.

"...You started it, Blair. Do you know why people avoid me?"