Just One Night

One night.

That was all he wanted.

One night of uninterrupted sleep. One night where he went to sleep and wasn't woken up late at night by two giggling drunks about to fornicate in the room next to him. He could hear the creaking of the bed springs, and worse, he could practically hear every other tiny detail of what was going on, too. He loathed it. He had begged Lisa Lisa to let him sleep somewhere else, but she'd just bluntly told him to suck it up and stop whining.

If Joseph was one thing, it was resourceful. He would find a way to get Caesar to shut up, even if it was only for one night. He wasn't having it anymore. He needed to focus on training. More importantly than that, he needed his beauty sleep. He could feel dark circles forming under his eyes. It was awful. Caesar was going to make him ugly.

After training, Joseph stood outside of Caesar's door. It was almost time for him to go out but there was no way in hell Joseph was going to let him. Not tonight, tonight he was going to get a good night's sleep.

Caesar opened his door, dressed in the suit he had worn when he first met Joseph; he was ready for a night of seducing ladies. He tipped his hat at Joseph, smiling mockingly.

"I'm afraid I'm taken for the evening, JoJo--you can enjoy my presence some other time."

Joseph crossed his arms over his chest, scoffing at him.

"Stay home tonight," Joseph told him bluntly. "Or else."

"Or else I have a nice time with a beautiful girl. What an astute observation."

"Caesar, I'm serious, you're killing me here!" he whined, motioning to his eyes. "Do you see these dark circles?! Come on, give me a break!"

Joseph shoved his hands into his pockets, feeling the clackers he had stuffed there. Just in case.

"I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about," he said, raising an eyebrow. "Get more sleep."

Joseph ground his teeth together. Didn't know what he was talking about?! Even if it was meant to be a joke, it was too much. "Caesar...I tried to warn you."

He pulled the clackers from his pockets with a menacing grin.

He rolled his eyes and kept walking.

"Have fun playing with yourself tonight, I guess."

"I've been practicing!" Joseph insisted, using the clackers to trip Caesar. He jumped on top of Caesar, sitting on his chest. He grinned as he used the other set to tie Caesar's hands above his head. When he was finished, he hefted Caesar over his shoulder, nonchalantly carrying him back into his room and setting him on his bed.

"I'll come get you in the morning, ooooooookay~?" he said with a wide grin. "Sleep well~!!"

"JoJo, this isn't funny!" he shouted, struggling. "I have a date to meet--if you make me late, so help me--" As much as Caesar had always had little patience for Joseph, tonight there was a particular amount of vitriol in his voice.

Joseph paused in the doorway, turning back around to face Caesar.

"Look, you didn't want to listen, there was no other option, okay?" he said, in a sad attempt to justify himself.

"Joseph! I'm not kidding!" he yelled. "I am going to be in pain tonight if you don't let me go, and if that happens, I'll kick your ass!"

Joseph swallowed. This was kind of scary, actually. He hadn't realized Caesar would be quite this angry.

"Well, then maybe I just won't untie you tomorrow, you'll have to figure it out yourself," Joseph said, trying to inch towards the door once more. "So, uh...yeah, seeya tomorrow!!"

"I will kick your ass so hard Wham and ACDC will find nothing left over!" he hissed. "Let me go now!"

Joseph closed the door behind him with a heavy sigh. He crossed over to where Caesar was tied up on the bed and sat on his legs, leaning over him so that their faces were inches apart.

"Look, Caesar...," he began, running a hand through his messy hair. "I'll untie you...if you promise not to bring a chick back to your room. Otherwise, no deal."

"Am I being too subtle here, or something?" he asked incredulously. "I'm a man, JoJo--if I don't get off every night, it hurts."

"Don't be such a drama queen," Joseph scoffed. "There's no way it has to be every night. You can handle it, I have faith in you."

He happily patted Caesar on the head, ruffling his hair.

He glared at him.

"It has to be every night. Only once per day is pushing it."

"Well, I don't know what to tell you, maybe if you try really hard you can still masturbate even while you're tied up," Joseph replied, shrugging.

"Or you can fucking untie me, and I can go have dinner with the woman who is going to alleviate my problem tonight."

"No deal! C'mon, Caesar, do me this favor just once?" he begged. "Come on, I'll do something for you..."

Joseph grinned suddenly. "Wait, wait, I know! So, all you want is to get off, right?" he asked, once again leaning in very close to Caesar's face. "Then here, in exchange for staying home tonight, I'll just, like, give you a handjob. A totally harmless, friendly handjob, from one friend to another."

"...What?" His brows scrunched together as he frowned at at him. "Are you...coming on to me?"

"No!" Joseph shouted immediately. "I'm just...I'm just saying, you would get off, and I would get some sleep for once, so like, it's a win-win right? And it's not gay or anything, 'cause, you know, I'm just helping a friend out."

He nodded slowly, still squinting at him.

"I suppose...that would remedy both our problems. But I've never let a man touch me before."

"Well, it's not like you have a place to really argue," Joseph replied matter-of-factly. "But, if you don't want me to, then I'm just gonna leave you tied up here, but...after you get off, I can go ahead and untie you...so, it's really your choice."