Who Ya Gonna Call?!

Mars blushed slightly, knowing that was completely accurate.

"What do you care?!"

He smiled.

"You know that women like that can neither achieve happiness nor give it? I've known a few."

Mars glared at him.

"You simply don't know what you're talking about."

He shrugged.

"What you want is a person who neither knows nor lives for themself. And someone like that can never be your partner, only your trophy shell."

"I want someone who is as devoted as I am!" He replied simply. "Nothing more, nothing less."

"There are women like that; they're called nuns," he replied, shrugging.

"I'll find someone." He replied stubbornly.

"She'll also be horrible in bed and a bad role model for your daughters."

"Now you're just slandering her."

He shook his head.

"It's true; we're talking the type of woman who doesn't understand foreplay, or why kissed are needed for anything but the marriage vow. A woman who hardly understands basic human anatomy, who shuns even her own body from her knowledge because those parts are 'impure'. And a sheltered woman of blind faith will raise your daughters to be the same; wouldn't you rather your kin grow to be strong, independent women?" He spoke calmly and rationally for once.

Mars refused to accept any of that as legitimate.

"I'll find the perfect woman one day and then I'll show you." He said, stubborn as ever.

He grinned.

"Okay, buddy. Here's a deal--you show me your perfect woman, and I'll show you an empty woman. Or, if you give me a few hours, a liberated and perhaps no longer virginal woman."

Mars wrinkled his nose what Priestly was suggesting.

"You truly are disgusting."

He laughed.

"I'd sleep with someone to help them find their path--am I so wrong for being a martyr?"

"Sex is not used for the purpose!" He barked. "It's intended only for procreation!"

Priestly chuckled.

"Ah, but who here knows more about God, do you think? No offense, but you're the student here."

Mars barely resisted the urge to attack Priestly and strangle him half to death.

"Just finish the mission."

"For God," he said, winking at Mars. He shone the flashlight around the room once more, frowning. "...That's strange..."

"What is?" He asked at once. Truthfully, he was just glad to be focusing on the mission again.

"I don't see any--"

A low growl emitted from a corner of the room, and he fell silent.

Mars tensed up and slowly reached for his rosary, which he used for exorcisms among other things.

Something made scuttling noises; Priestly quickly moved the beam of the flashlight to illuminate...a rat, scuttling across the floor.

Mars frowned.

Cautiously he whispered, "You don't see any what...?"

It was then that a large stack of boxes toppled over; when the dust cleared, Priestly was laying on top of Mars.

"Are you alright?" He asked quietly, trying to get Priestly to move off of him so he could get to his feet. Of course, it was then he realized that he'd dropped his rosary. He felt around for it but he couldn't feel it.