A Fairly Emo Reboot

"It's okay," he said. "I still love you. I can't give up on my reason for living that easily...you should come and see me. I'll be in the purple van, the one offering psychic readings."

He rolled his eyes.

"Great job prostituting your powers. Really digging deep to find meaning in 'em." He snorted. "What the fuck ever, I'll pay you a visit...if I feel like it."

There was really no doubt in his mind that he would go see him, though. He was curious to see Claude in action.

"I'm glad I came," he said, grinning. "You have a nicer ass than I imagined--you know, I'd love to get my gay hands all over it."

He shuddered.

"Augh! That's so fuckin' gross, get out!" He shouted, making another face.

"You do have a penis, right? Because if you do, I totally want to suck it."

He stood up, throwing the controller at him.

"I said get out, you fucking fag!" He shouted, though he was less angry and more amused. He tried to act angry, though.

Claude halted the controller in mid-air, setting it down on the table.

"Why, afraid I'll spread my gay? Are you that insecure in your heterosexuality, Frederich?"

He was immediately impressed with Claude, but he didn't let it show too much, even if it was his first instinct.

"Of course I'm not afraid of something fucktarded like that!" He snapped angrily. "You know what?! FINE I'll go on your stupid date, but you're paying for fucking everything and if you even try to hit on me, I'll break your face, you hear me?!"

"You won't break my face," he said, shrugging. "And I will hit on you. I've waited for this for years." He wrapped a controller cord around Frederich's arm.

"It's fine if you don't love me, but I still love you."

He made yet another face.

"God, you're such a sick fuck I can't even..." He groaned. "When's our little stupid gay ass 'date' then, anyway? I just want to get it over with."

He unzipped his jacket, revealing a torn sweatshirt underneath. The combined holes showed off a surprising amount of skin.

"If you want, we can just skip the date."

He glared at him.

"...If this conversation is going where I think it is, why the fuck would you even ask!? I think the answer is pretty obvious!" He shouted angrily.

This wasn't good. Frederich couldn't have sex.

"You've always wanted dick, but you were just to afraid," he said. Teasing Frederich was fun, though he couldn't shake the feelings that their was something off about his protests. The way his aura never quite shifted to match his expressions. He shrugged inwardly; it was probably nothing. Maybe it was his unwavering sexuality, whatever it was.

He covered his mouth. Disgust was the expression he was making, but for an entirely different reason.

"Never mind! Just get the fuck out of my house, I don't even want to look at your disgusting face anymore!"

"You're pretty funny," he chuckled. "I like that you pretend to be afraid of what you want."

"I'm telling you!" He shouted angrily. "I am straight! I like boobs, and women and even if I did like dudes? I still don't like you!"

He wished Claude would just let it go...He supposed that he was lucky that he could deny being gay for forever, though. There was no way Claude could get him aroused in the slightest.

"Have you ever tried blowing a guy?" he asked. "How can you know if you haven't tried? That's just silly."

This time, Frederich barely even had to act. He truly was disgusted.

"That's just..." He shuddered. "Get out, already! You're so fucking gross, there's no way I'm letting you be my partner, now!"

Claude was too much hassle. Shame.

He laughed again.

"You sure have a hard time telling when people are joking, you know? What kind of slut has sex with a stranger five minutes after meeting them?"

"Uhm, you?" He asked incredulously. "You sure dress like that kind of slut, and I mean, come the fuck on, you waltzed in here declaring your faggoty love for me like five minutes ago, in case you forgot."

He crossed his arms.

"Joking or not, get out."

"I'll see you again," he said, grabbing his coat. "I can sense it."

He laughed.

"Fuck you."

Of course, Frederich was pretty positive Claude was right. Unfortunately.

"Please do," he responded, only half-joking. He clapped Frederich on the back. "I like you, even if you're kind of slow. Even if you're just a friend."

He just grumbled.

"Get away from me."

He blew a kiss, deciding to push his luck.

"See you later," he said, slinking out the door.